22.3.05
C-H-I-L-D-I-S-H
This is an open letter to the man or woman who is posting anonymously on the blog of Miss Klingler:

Dear Anonymous,

If I may...after careful consideration, I believe your argument is flawed. On your Feb. 10, 2005 response, you commented "Guys, could I suggest you get a life? I mean, you have dedicated a lot of time to a guy you think so 'little' of, how about you move on to bigger and better things. Louis certainly has. What about you?" (emphasis added)

May I play devil's advocate for a moment?

We see here that you have suggested 'you guys' get a life because 'you guys' have dedicated so much time to slamming Mr. Badalament. This is simply a fallacy. In one post nearly two months ago, Mae called our attention to Mr. Badalament's weather report (which, regardless of Mr. Badalaments success or failure as a journalist, is hilarious. You cannot deny this. I bet even Badalament himself has the courage to chuckle at his own performance.) Following the Feb. 10 post, i can assure you that Badalament was never mentioned. Not once. It appears that 'you guys' had certainly moved on with their lives.

It seems that you, anonymous posting-man, are the one wasting time. I mean, you're good at math. MIT, right? Add it up. When you compare the time it took to write one post to the time it took to comment on about a dozen blog entries, I think you'll find who has employed the greater number of hours.

Do you follow?

Also, please, for the sake of your own image, never, ever, EVER spell out an insult. It makes you look childish. Very immature. Unless you're in the fifth grade, in which case, you're A-W-E-S-O-M-E. I mean, it's amusing for the readers, but not in the way you want it to be. It's the same way that Evil Dead is hilarious. Only i think the producers of that piece made it that bad on purpose. (ohhh buurn!)

let's take another look.

I think you would make a great pet Mae, after all you are beastly...and you do have some doggish features. You would make a great dog! Although dogs are more appealing to look at and have a less vapid personality then yourself. You should sport a collar and leash at least it would be safe to be around you...

Oh, where to begin. First of all...vapid? Who says that? Looks like someone had their word-of-the-day calendar handy. And I would argue that Mae is in fact a very animated and lively person. Have you even met her? Also, don't say "sport" like that. This word best used in a comical tone.

Secondly, comparing people to animals is cliche at best. And you did it in back-to-back entries, saying that Mae has many things in common with both a guinea pig and a dog. If overused, what we will refer to as "the animal dis" does not exactly cut to the heart of your opponent. Again, a very amateur thing to say. People are laughing at you. And not the good kind!

Only a couple more things. Bear with me here, as I am only trying to help you in your craft.

In a previously mentioned post you stated, "I can understand that Louis is quite idiosyncratic, but he is defiantly not an idiot." Read over Mae's post and I can assure you that she never even came close to calling him an idiot. It was only you who suggested this.

Finally, please understand that "your" is possessive, while "you're" is a contraction for the words "you" and "are." Please start differentiating between the two. You're insults will be much more affective. (See? Don't you loose respect for me after this mistake?) Believe this.

You say that Louis has moved on from this. I understand he has two science-fiction books pending publication and is currently writing a book on Italian Folklore? Great. I'm happy for him. Mae is happy for him. We all are. We love Louis. We're glad he exists and is a part of our lives. We mean no harm in sharing his weather forecast on the www. Please give us his email so that we can talk to him about this.

In the meantime, please take your own advice and move on. Your intension (to defend your friend, i hope) is noble, however, you are only making yourself look like an idiot. Yes, an idiot. And you can say later that I called you that.

Hugs,
Lyndsey Teter

PS- The stuff you say about her grandma - yeah, that just doesn't make any sense.
PSS- and i'll thank you to ignore the less-than-subtle hypocrisy within this post, (along with and the inordinate amount of time I spent writing it!) (and the use of "inordinate," while you're at it!) Leave me be! I'm just trying to defend my friend here...(ok i hope you get it by now.) I am Mark Twain.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 4:02 PM  
2 Comments:
  • At 22 March, 2005 18:15, Blogger Claudine said…

    Sometimes hitting the "next blog" button really pays off. Great site. Speak your mind, girl!

     
  • At 22 March, 2005 20:39, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    remember, marquis of queensbury rules, folks. also, dude? i can't get over this website with peter the penecost lamb or whatever. it's...i just.....maybe it's not.....right? help?

     
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