31.8.06
jobs that make more than me
part duex
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 10:55 AM   1 comments
29.8.06
jill carroll v. ms. filipiak
I'm sure everybody has already said this, but geez.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 11:16 AM   0 comments
pictures that will change your life part one.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 11:07 AM   1 comments
24.8.06
somebunny loves me
Who spent more than one hour reading my blog at "work?" Twenty-five page views and an outclick on "taco baby"?!?

Actually, it's about time someone reads my online diary.

Does this say more about you or more about me?

The good news is that I am the second most popular google reference for "monique ming laven hot," which is validating.

hugs and kisses,
theteet.blogspot.com
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 5:36 PM   1 comments
re: the Worthington shooting
"This is why, if you are going to investigate haunted houses by the cemetery, you drive a green van and bring a talking dog..."

That's cut,copy & paste kinda gold, there, my friends. Thank you, mr_bunny of Fark.com.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 12:28 PM   1 comments
A morsel, if you will, with regard to the media.
They come perking from the Lantern or Bowling Green or Otterbein, excited to begin a career in journalism. I watch them wander the halls as I once did, searching for the bathroom, the reverse telephone books or the vending machines. They whisper in the corners about the other side of the building. One girl went over there once and never came back, she heard. Another returned, pale-faced and trembling.

They've all read his quick, smart-ass columns about misguided politicians or department store cashiers, and they fallen for him. Hard core. His devoted fan base of twenty-something females dream about the day they may run into him at the water cooler, or better yet, speak to him in a real-life co-worker-type situation -- or even sicker, still -- they dream of the day they, too, might become legitimate journalists.

Then the company picnic happens, or, for the really brave ones, there is a quick sneak by his office to get a peak. Either way, the inevitable crash is painful. A coming of age. Something every 22-year-old woman must go through.

Ladies, listen to me. Dan Williamson? Not as hot in real life.

Look at him thirty years ago, in his dark-collared dress shirt, smirking in the flattering light with the artsy blurried background. Sadly, since that misleading head shot was taken (and subsequently printed week after week) the face has engorged a bit. Hair and teeth have fallen out. Ailments have set in. When they find out, everything changes. Suddenly, in the aftermath, they no longer want to have his babies. They second-guess everything about their lives, their careers, their crash-diets, their marriages.

And no matter what older and wiser women advise, the cycle continues. One broken spirit after another. Until the head shot is updated, I fear the worse for each bright-eyed doe who walks into the news room.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 11:37 AM   0 comments
17.8.06
thug life

More shutterfly fun.

fyi - Something terrible has happened to our wedding photos. I have contacted my photographer. The situation will be remedied soon.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 5:33 PM   0 comments
13.8.06
baby's first factory farm
i was mowing when i saw a flash of pig streak by, which is normal for a Sunday afternoon.

i immediately started yelling "TREATS!" which is our buzzword for "Maybel if you turn around now, not only will you not be struck by an oncoming vehicle, but you'll get a tasty reward."

The thing kept right on sprinting for the road, and the terror set in. Any who have seen me jet onto oncoming traffic to save Maybel's life know how fast I can move.

As I sprinted closer, I noticed it was a pig all right, but not one of our own.


So um...

We have a baby piglet in our house now. Naturally.

Seth's work has a department chair for everything, including situations like this. The Co-worker's best advice? Build a pen and feed it. It will be ready for a hog roast in 6 months.

So, we'll see how this goes.

posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 3:17 PM   0 comments
8.8.06
somebody oughta sell tickets
In the fem-truck-driver-seen-with-a-jesus-bobble-head-doll sense of the word, seth reports another T-shirt sighting of note, this time at the state level.

The young lady's shirt read "Jesus GODder Done," with God in caps, of course.
Hope in human kind? Restored.

So how unpopular has blogging become? Are you trying to cut me off, or what? I miss you but have never been good at calling. You know that. Please enable this bad habit with a few snippets, would you?

If I cast a date out far enough on the horizon, will everyone be able to migrate to Knox County? There are birthdays and all sorts of celebrations coming up or have already past, and I want to gather us all together at a place and time that's convenient for me. I also hope to remind Colleen that I have yet to travel north to see her.

So I'm thinking of something in the October range. Not Halloween, but far enough away to give our beer some time to brew (we haven't started it yet -- any requests?) I'm thinking it would be maybe the first weekend we won't really NEED to wear long sleeves, but we'll want to. Maybe things could start with an OSU football game, and lead to the inevitable trip to the mansion .03 miles from our home.

What do you think? Oct. 14? Michigan State?

In the meantime, every weekend from then until now, we will not be available for social activities in Columbus. I'm sorry. There is too much work to be done.
Sometime between Saturday and the day of our two-year wedding anniversary, I was moving buckets full of soggy ash and mud into the dumpster when I cursed the former property owners of our home on Possum Street. There is a strange, incomprehensible joy that comes out of all of this. I can't wait to show you pictures of the dumpster.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 7:54 AM   1 comments
1.8.06
on success.
When interviewing a devout atheist who boasts the largest machine gun collection in the nation, do not, under any circumstances, mention your association with the Mennonite Church.

I am underblogged for the week. My pores hurt.

Today, one year ago, Biker Bob went scraping across Mink Road, and the rest is history. Holy Moses. Can you effing believe it? One year down, thirty to go until the children cry at my presence. I'm on my way.

Speaking of Mennonites, I went to a Vineyard Church. Much is left to be desired. Everyone was nice and so very Caucasian. The pastor seems legit ("We encourage failure in our church community...") But what do you think about all the Hocus Pocus? I think it's real, but never on TV, and usually not in PUBLIC and a SCHEDULED TIME and PLACE. BE THERE. YOU. WILL. FALL. DOWN. That kind of thing.

I missed the sweet sweet voices of my pitch pipe perfect brothas and sistas from Clintonville (...as split from the Anabaptists in the Radical Reformation in the 1530s to follow Menno Simons, of course.) They sure know how to carry a tune.

County Fair dispatches from the Knox County Bureau:

A healthy six-pack of girls sport sleeveless tanks that read "I've got a Honkey Tonk Badonkadonk." (Worth the price of admission.)

A red head with an unfortunate cleft pallet wears T-shirt that reads: "I had a nightmare I was a blond." (Priceless.)

In other news, Maybel. Yeast infection of the paws. From licking too much. Can't walk. Wears a cone. Film at eleven.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 1:22 PM   0 comments
About Me

Name: Class of 2000 officers

Home: Columbus, Ohio, United States

About Me:
See my complete profile

Boiling down and dressing up mundane since 2004.

Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Proudly serving as Google's #3 reference for Megan Pringle hot since 2007, and Google's #2 reference for "claudia schiffer"+"gold pants" since 2007.

for our boss.
i'm glad you're here.
for public officials, etc.
welcome wagon.
buzz.

"The perfect amount ... of panache."

-- Blogspot's Mae Klingler

"Funny and insightful..."

--Diaryland's Lemonscarlet

"I read your blog the other day."

--Jim Woods, Dispatch reporter

"You're not putting that on the Internet, are you?"

--family and friends

we must stop meeting like this.
klingler. rankin. strader. Nadine. i talked to her once and she was hilarious. jessm. Do the Dew. newbie. SJP. welcome to earf. the original spiderman. not safe around house plants. pencils from heaven. aholeonapc. e-normal. nevada. Look, ma. KT. name without a face. knows how to party. secret reading. bobservations. filipiak boy. filipiak girl. My sis, the blonde. Wogan's Heroes.
on notice.
blagers.
blager girls. blager boy.
i heart internets.
passiveagressivenotes. apostrophe abuse. literally the best thing on the Web. too much cute.
previously on.
you saw it here first.
visuals.

theteet in pictures.

i heart internet two.
for pervs. freestyle nollie. free love freeway. NEW AMAZING FOOTAGE. jesus the hot air balloon. bubbles. aokusa. Gold Pants. fashion. Watch This Movie. the man who is always there for you is always here. Lambuel. cartoons. farming is fun!

I was on the front porch, drowning a mouse in a bucket when this van pulled up, which was strange.

my first lover

user guide.


Name: Seth
Alias: Teth Seter or Steter.
In Brief: The Steter in his natural habitat. Married to theteet.blogspot.com since August 2004. Often the victim of serious hyperbole. Handy.
Hates: Noise, Dominion Homes, above-the-nipple touching, when people get 'handsy.'
Loves: pies (of any kind), dirt, smoking a pipe after eating pie. also, cows.

Name: Maybel
Alias: The Pig or Boobles.
In Brief: Kentucky-born English Bulldog since February 2006.
Hates: Watermelon. All other kinds of melon. The sound of a new trash bag being opened and sitting in the back seat.
Loves: Treats, walks, Charlie, 'humping it out' and barfing.


Name: Amanda
Alias: The Sister.
In Brief: theteet's younger (but larger) sister. Survived a brain bleed in February 2007.
Hates: minor inconveniences that make her blurt out uncontrollably, brain bleeds.
Loves: UFC, cornhole, texting, fast food and her dog Charlie.


Name: mom and dad.
Alias: the 'rents.
In Brief: Ashland natives and frequent visitors. They taught me how to swear.
Hates: hospitals.
Loves: squirrels and lattes.


Name: Mae
Alias: Klingler or Maddog.
In Brief: Cincinnati resident and former college/Old Towne East roommate. Once wrote a song that made theteet cry.
Hates: Hate.
Loves: Jesus, family, puns, guitars and gardening.


Name: Colleen
Alias: Crankin and Rankin.
In Brief: Akron resident and former college roomie. Arguably more handy than Seth. Nice bosom for hugging.
Hates: all drivers.
Loves: beer, coffee, cigarettes and boys we all find strange.


Name: Talya
Alias: Strader and Sweet T.
In Brief: Chicago resident and former college roomie. served brief stint at theteet's 'accountability partner.' collects monthly fee for keeping quiet.
Hates: people who do not comment on her blog.
Loves: social justice, eggs, her boyfriend monsterbeard and the occupation of barista.


Name: Chris
Alias: Christopher, Monsterbeard and Nadine.
In Brief: Chicago resident and college buddy. Maker of 'We once waited up in the dark with a gun,' and other misadventures.
Hates: people who are looking the other way.
Loves: history, film, his girlfriend Strader and acronyms.


Name: pdawg.
Alias: none needed.
In Brief: Former co-worker who is willing to eat waffles with theteet at 4 in the morning regardless of level of snow emergency.
Hates: anyone under the age of 35.
Loves: Hostess pies, old man rants and golf.


Name: Linsly.
Alias: MERLIN, lin or newbie.
In Brief: Former co-worker who lived with us for a week. I can tell this kid anything. He's like a brother.
Hates: sexual predators.
Loves: zombies, guns, porch chats and movie quotes.


Name: jaydubs.
Alias: jwray and 10bagspacking.
In Brief: Co-worker who taught me everything I know about the world.
Hates: mean jokes, mushrooms, clipping fingernails in the office.
Loves: crafts, her gay-together but also betrothed person Kyle, Columbus Bride Magazine, veggie-friendliness and basil.


Name: jessica.
Alias: jessm.
In Brief: College buddy with the amazing handshake. I believe she might be back from Alaska and living in Hudson now.
Hates: poverty.
Loves: Jesus, jazz, geography and hilarious t-shirts.


Name: brittiny.
Alias: Brit-Brat, experimental dater or The Dunlap.
In Brief: Former co-worker (notice a theme here?) who started with me at SNP on the same day. Former Sorority president taught me the ropes of being a lady. her wisdom did not take.
Hates: visible pany line.
Loves: cocktails, shoes, 'the blue box' and her boyfriend the Lizard.


Name: garth and jen.
Alias: not safe around house plants and the real spider-man and/or HSnothingswronghere.
In Brief: Co-worker couple who proved themselves fun at work and on the farm. Periodically forced to kiss in gas station parking lots.
Hates: local broadcast news reporters.
Loves: zombies, movie quotes, Indianapolis and lin rice.


Name: Angie.
Alias: captain cool.
In Brief: Former co-worker who stole my heart. She is the only thing I've ever lost to the Youngstown Vindicator.
Hates: joe and misogynists.
Loves: celebrity gossip, hilarious captions, biking/hiking, her boyfriend Jef, her mom and Columbus.

Name: Melville.
Alias: welcome to earf or bad town.
In Brief: Former co-worker who let me inherit his seat at SNP. For a while, he was the only one who would talk Reynoldsburg politics with me.
Hates: fleas, eminent domain and people who flip the bird.
Loves: his evil cat, running, opinions, beer and Tom Waits.


Name: The Gerish.
Alias: The Gerish.
In Brief: Co-worker and rare, elusive creature. If you're lucky, you'll see a tousle of black hair breeze by over the cubicle wall.
Hates: Things that aren't crackers.
Loves: crackers.


Name: Dennis.
Alias: secret reading.
In Brief: Co-worker and rare, elusive creature. If you're lucky, he'll walk over and talk to you. But he probably won't. Once took my sister-in-law to Homecoming.
Hates: The damn kids who walk in his yard.
Loves: Corgis, Cedar Point and Rachael. But not the one you're thinking of.

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