30.4.06
I am host.
If you choose to purchase your home "As Is," these are the top five things you never want to hear your home inspector say... (It should be noted that you've paid $300 for your home inspector to be there):

1. I've seen houses in New Orleans in better shape than this one.
2. It would probably cost less to rent a bulldozer.
3. I'd say it's "borderline uninhabitable."
4. I don't really feel comfortable standing here. (For fear of collapse)

Homebuying is fun.

Concluding statements.

-At our price range, any home with a tiny bit of acreage is likely to require some repairs. The trick is finding one we can get away with.
-This "home we can get away with" does exist or will exist. It will just take patience.

Also, I have been less that forthright with you. It was not a tapeworm, unfortunately, but just a stomach virus. I'm not sure where I acquired it, but I'm pretty sure it was God's way of punishing me for tanning. Like, in one of those sweaty capsules with the lights and the sub-par disinfectant spray.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 8:08 AM   1 comments
26.4.06
silver bears need help.
Being a grown-up is hard.

We just found a $173 charge had been sent to a collection agency only a few days ago. This is not good as you're shopping for a mortgage. It seems that Lyndsey Johnson did not transfer her electric service to Clintonville. When we called to switch all our utilities, they moved Seth, but they did not move me.

I knew we should have invited AEP to the wedding. Bogus.

Also, I have a tapeworm from playing in a forbidden stream. We're "In Contract" with a home just east of Carroll "Pending Inspection."

I am freakishly busy. Especially with all these parasites in tow.

In this job, while you're bleeding volumes and volumes of copy, there are often stories you wish you could have spent a few more minutes writing. I spent two hours talking to Al and his friends, at least twice that convincing the PR flack that I wasn't trying to ruin Kroger, and about 20 minutes writing the story. So it goes. Cutest man ever, by the way. I'm sorry I said mojo.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 6:52 PM   1 comments
18.4.06
Belief-O-Matic
I am 100 percent Orthodox Quaker, in case you didn't know. I am also 33 percent Neo-Pagan and 20 percent Scientologist. As much as it saddens me, there is not a Mennonite bone in my body.

Look here to find out what you are.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 6:50 AM   8 comments
16.4.06
There's no other way to say this, but.
There's something weird about seeing your gynecologist in Panera, with his hands wrapped around a half a Sierra Turkey, eating in uncomfortable silence with his wife. Should I feel guilty? Because I did. What if she knows? How many other patients were in the local deli? I tried not to look either of them directly, but I sort of tripped near their table and had to acknowledge him. So...How about that Lord of the Rings? It was as awkward as usual, with a little less boob-touching. Seriously. Sick. Which reminds me. MAE?!

Man, you guys. Aaron and Kate bought 77 acres in West Virginia. I spoke personally with Jim Wallis. The time sprung forward. I was sought out by another employer. We found a house. My parents sort of decided move to El Paso. I had my first baby article published in Monthly. People got engaged and had their ovaries removed. People had pacemakers installed and others had their first birthday parties. Maybel went through her second heat cycle. These are all the things you missed.

So, I didn't read everything I missed, but I did browse titles. What is your state? Are you broken? Are you Ohio? Have you moved, acquire pets, etc? I'm looking for a top five. To catch me up, as I didn't really call anyone. I didn't really learn anything. I just broke the fever, I think. Which is important.

Don't worry. I filled my time with other media, with other games. More TV. I didn't walk away with a prize or anything. In fact, for the first time in 5 years, Good Friday went by with no sort of extended reflection or prayer time. Because of the rain, I almost forgot it was Easter. Apparently, there is work to be done that takes longer than 40 days to fix. I'm happy to say it's good to be back. But not better than it should be.
posted by Class of 2000 officers @ 6:33 PM   1 comments
About Me

Name: Class of 2000 officers

Home: Columbus, Ohio, United States

About Me:
See my complete profile

Boiling down and dressing up mundane since 2004.

Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Proudly serving as Google's #3 reference for Megan Pringle hot since 2007, and Google's #2 reference for "claudia schiffer"+"gold pants" since 2007.

for our boss.
i'm glad you're here.
for public officials, etc.
welcome wagon.
buzz.

"The perfect amount ... of panache."

-- Blogspot's Mae Klingler

"Funny and insightful..."

--Diaryland's Lemonscarlet

"I read your blog the other day."

--Jim Woods, Dispatch reporter

"You're not putting that on the Internet, are you?"

--family and friends

we must stop meeting like this.
klingler. rankin. strader. Nadine. i talked to her once and she was hilarious. jessm. Do the Dew. newbie. SJP. welcome to earf. the original spiderman. not safe around house plants. pencils from heaven. aholeonapc. e-normal. nevada. Look, ma. KT. name without a face. knows how to party. secret reading. bobservations. filipiak boy. filipiak girl. My sis, the blonde. Wogan's Heroes.
on notice.
blagers.
blager girls. blager boy.
i heart internets.
passiveagressivenotes. apostrophe abuse. literally the best thing on the Web. too much cute.
previously on.
you saw it here first.
visuals.

theteet in pictures.

i heart internet two.
for pervs. freestyle nollie. free love freeway. NEW AMAZING FOOTAGE. jesus the hot air balloon. bubbles. aokusa. Gold Pants. fashion. Watch This Movie. the man who is always there for you is always here. Lambuel. cartoons. farming is fun!

I was on the front porch, drowning a mouse in a bucket when this van pulled up, which was strange.

my first lover

user guide.


Name: Seth
Alias: Teth Seter or Steter.
In Brief: The Steter in his natural habitat. Married to theteet.blogspot.com since August 2004. Often the victim of serious hyperbole. Handy.
Hates: Noise, Dominion Homes, above-the-nipple touching, when people get 'handsy.'
Loves: pies (of any kind), dirt, smoking a pipe after eating pie. also, cows.

Name: Maybel
Alias: The Pig or Boobles.
In Brief: Kentucky-born English Bulldog since February 2006.
Hates: Watermelon. All other kinds of melon. The sound of a new trash bag being opened and sitting in the back seat.
Loves: Treats, walks, Charlie, 'humping it out' and barfing.


Name: Amanda
Alias: The Sister.
In Brief: theteet's younger (but larger) sister. Survived a brain bleed in February 2007.
Hates: minor inconveniences that make her blurt out uncontrollably, brain bleeds.
Loves: UFC, cornhole, texting, fast food and her dog Charlie.


Name: mom and dad.
Alias: the 'rents.
In Brief: Ashland natives and frequent visitors. They taught me how to swear.
Hates: hospitals.
Loves: squirrels and lattes.


Name: Mae
Alias: Klingler or Maddog.
In Brief: Cincinnati resident and former college/Old Towne East roommate. Once wrote a song that made theteet cry.
Hates: Hate.
Loves: Jesus, family, puns, guitars and gardening.


Name: Colleen
Alias: Crankin and Rankin.
In Brief: Akron resident and former college roomie. Arguably more handy than Seth. Nice bosom for hugging.
Hates: all drivers.
Loves: beer, coffee, cigarettes and boys we all find strange.


Name: Talya
Alias: Strader and Sweet T.
In Brief: Chicago resident and former college roomie. served brief stint at theteet's 'accountability partner.' collects monthly fee for keeping quiet.
Hates: people who do not comment on her blog.
Loves: social justice, eggs, her boyfriend monsterbeard and the occupation of barista.


Name: Chris
Alias: Christopher, Monsterbeard and Nadine.
In Brief: Chicago resident and college buddy. Maker of 'We once waited up in the dark with a gun,' and other misadventures.
Hates: people who are looking the other way.
Loves: history, film, his girlfriend Strader and acronyms.


Name: pdawg.
Alias: none needed.
In Brief: Former co-worker who is willing to eat waffles with theteet at 4 in the morning regardless of level of snow emergency.
Hates: anyone under the age of 35.
Loves: Hostess pies, old man rants and golf.


Name: Linsly.
Alias: MERLIN, lin or newbie.
In Brief: Former co-worker who lived with us for a week. I can tell this kid anything. He's like a brother.
Hates: sexual predators.
Loves: zombies, guns, porch chats and movie quotes.


Name: jaydubs.
Alias: jwray and 10bagspacking.
In Brief: Co-worker who taught me everything I know about the world.
Hates: mean jokes, mushrooms, clipping fingernails in the office.
Loves: crafts, her gay-together but also betrothed person Kyle, Columbus Bride Magazine, veggie-friendliness and basil.


Name: jessica.
Alias: jessm.
In Brief: College buddy with the amazing handshake. I believe she might be back from Alaska and living in Hudson now.
Hates: poverty.
Loves: Jesus, jazz, geography and hilarious t-shirts.


Name: brittiny.
Alias: Brit-Brat, experimental dater or The Dunlap.
In Brief: Former co-worker (notice a theme here?) who started with me at SNP on the same day. Former Sorority president taught me the ropes of being a lady. her wisdom did not take.
Hates: visible pany line.
Loves: cocktails, shoes, 'the blue box' and her boyfriend the Lizard.


Name: garth and jen.
Alias: not safe around house plants and the real spider-man and/or HSnothingswronghere.
In Brief: Co-worker couple who proved themselves fun at work and on the farm. Periodically forced to kiss in gas station parking lots.
Hates: local broadcast news reporters.
Loves: zombies, movie quotes, Indianapolis and lin rice.


Name: Angie.
Alias: captain cool.
In Brief: Former co-worker who stole my heart. She is the only thing I've ever lost to the Youngstown Vindicator.
Hates: joe and misogynists.
Loves: celebrity gossip, hilarious captions, biking/hiking, her boyfriend Jef, her mom and Columbus.

Name: Melville.
Alias: welcome to earf or bad town.
In Brief: Former co-worker who let me inherit his seat at SNP. For a while, he was the only one who would talk Reynoldsburg politics with me.
Hates: fleas, eminent domain and people who flip the bird.
Loves: his evil cat, running, opinions, beer and Tom Waits.


Name: The Gerish.
Alias: The Gerish.
In Brief: Co-worker and rare, elusive creature. If you're lucky, you'll see a tousle of black hair breeze by over the cubicle wall.
Hates: Things that aren't crackers.
Loves: crackers.


Name: Dennis.
Alias: secret reading.
In Brief: Co-worker and rare, elusive creature. If you're lucky, he'll walk over and talk to you. But he probably won't. Once took my sister-in-law to Homecoming.
Hates: The damn kids who walk in his yard.
Loves: Corgis, Cedar Point and Rachael. But not the one you're thinking of.

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